plz talk dirty to me
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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