My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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