sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
