do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
