Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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