Christians are straight up FREAKS
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
