Do you still have your period?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
