you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
