I'm drive I can fine osifer
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
