i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
