He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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