No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Randomize
