doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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