So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize
