k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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