Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
