When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
