Don't you send me to vm
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
