Fuck appropriateness.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
you win again, gameday.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
