Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
