I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
