you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
