you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize