whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
Randomize
