So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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