i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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