She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize