Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize