I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Nicole vs. Life
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
