oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
