Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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