Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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