if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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