I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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