gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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