All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Never joke about your clitoris.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
