Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
