Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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