Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(919): View more from North Carolina

It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I hope im prettier

(1-828): View more from North Carolina

yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying

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(541): View more from Oregon

its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.

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(339): View more from Massachusetts

I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.

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(716): View more from New York

I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess

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(585): View more from New York

I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.

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