So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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