OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
