so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
So here I am, sexting at work.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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