I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
