Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
