All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
