Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
there is puke in my bra ... again
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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