This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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