But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
