So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
