At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Couch. On fire.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
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